Monday, February 26, 2007

Good bye Ben LeBlanc, God Speed

My memories of Ben LeBlanc are good ones and happy. He's Pace's paternal grandfather and he died Friday at 97.

Pace and I were unable to make the service. Pace can't travel due to her surgery and logistics are against me; so France, Pierre and the wee one acted as our ambassadors.

Bye Bye Ben, you are loved by a great extended family.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Discharged and Discharges

I brought Pace back to Oka this afternoon. In the same conversation the doctors talked about discharging her from the and about what to do about discharges of blood or from the scar. Sometimes a thesaurus would really help the bedside manner.

When we got in the door the wee one was ecstatic to see her again. Pace's staples are out and the so is the catheter. The doctors have told here to walk, go up stairs and in general exercise, just let pain be your guide. The pain killers are a serious mask but you can see when they kick in.

Pace has spent a lot of time sleeping, and that is a good thing, when you sleep you mend.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

The wee one's flowers for "Mommy"


We didn't want to take The Wee One to St. Luc Hospital too soon. It's hard to see your loved one at first delirious from anesthetics then in a fog of pain followed by the lucidity of the painkillers. Pierre and I thought it was good for her to understand what's happening to Mama before she came home. Yet for her sake, we'd waited till the hydromorphine lowered Pace's deep abdominal pain and internal suffering.

Ma petit fille got help at Marlyne's day care making the Valentines Day Bag, the blue flower was her choice at the flower shop with France and Pierre, The plush flower was from Intramiel along with a pot of propolis for her surgical scar. The wee one and I like to go there to look at the farm animals, play on the slides, get Raspberry Flower Honey; there is a real difference in taste and lastly look for the Queen Bee; she has a green dot on the middle of her thorax. There was a small group of worker bees who have stayed on, buzzing around the Queen keeping her warm. The wee one's doesn't quite get the metaphor yet but it does describe the help we've been getting for the last 16 months.

So the wee one's sat next to Pace on the hospital bed and didn't move from there. She talked about her life and that "Mommy" would get better, checked out the bandage and she talked some more. She even stuck up an conversation with Pace's room-mate Madame Ducat. She definitely an extroverted one she takes after the both of us role models.
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Saturday, February 17, 2007

I'm not allowed in the hospital

I was woken up yesterday morning by the wee one wanting me to read her a Winne the Pooh books.

About 5 pages from the end I got this incredible call from mother nature. I struggled to finish the story and bolted to the bathroom. There is truth to the cliché that if you want to get sick go to the hospital. The documentation on hospital borne gastro infections like C difficile, are that they are highly contagious. However, if you are a normal helathy adult, with a strong immune system, it too will pass.

It lasted for two days and I embarked on an almost fanatical hygenic routine of hand washing and cleaning up after myself with Lysol, Purel, soap and water to reduce the risk of Pace getting this. Fortunaltly it worked, no one else has gotten it and I lost 10 pounds to boot. Pace feels that it's just stress and nerves; smile and nod yes Robert, just smile and nod yes.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Visitors from 2 to 4, yeah right

I stayed at the hospital from 3:00pm till about 2:00 am, talking, telling Pace to rest and working on the laptop when she was asleep. It was like a movie or tv cliche. Driving back through the snow covered streets was a challenge.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Another Successful Operation! A great Valentine's Day present.

Genevieve the resident gynecologist came by to see Pace this morning and told her that as far as everyone was concerned, her hysterectomy was a success. Pace has a small body and perfect anatomy. She liked hearing that. However if I say the same thing it just doesn't have the same effect on her. Maybe even with a variety of change-ups to the same complement years just doesn't seem as fresh after 18 years of repetition.  Anyways...

The surgeons had been concerned that as they cut through the scar of her cesarean section that some of the underlying organs had been connected to the scar tissue. That's a very major health problem if the cut causes bacteria to leak from the intestines. Last thing you want is a fluid from the intestines getting into your abdominal cavity and causing Peritonitis.

When they did get her open, and had clamped back the skin, they were a bit concerned because her intestines were not completely empty. One of the risks of any operation is a slip of the scalpel that nicks an organ.

So they got the intestine moved out of the way and there was the uterus and the ovaries. Genevieve said the operation was so smooth that they should have had the students in to witness how easy this operation can be.

Pace is in intense pain and the hot flashes have started again.

However, we are one step closer to getting this all behind us.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Unwanted surprises on the day of the Operation

I get to the hospital this morning with Pace's mom France to find the isolation sign back on the door; approval from the nurse, sanitary blouses and latex gloves required to enter the room. It took every moral fiber to keep my emotions from going thermo-nuclear. Even then I know that my frustration was visibly evident.

The nurse told me not to worry. They still did not have final confirming results from the tests but so far the tests are negative. "It's preventative and there's probably nothing to worry about."
"And would you want your husband hospitalized in the same room with people infected with c difficile?" I asked.
"That's not fair and it's more complicated than that." She replied.
"Sorry, but it feels like you're gambling that all will be well." I observed
"We're taking all of the necessary precautions." She insisted and then added. "Make sure you wear the sanitary gown and gloves."
I bit my tongue to keep from saying something I'd regret and causing resentment towards Pace.

The operation was to take 2.5 hours in total. The operation itself is an hour; the other time is getting her set up and into the recovery room.

Pace was told she'd go down for her operation at 11:15am. We got no news until they finally came for her at 2:00pm.

It's disconcerting because we know from experience that the operation would be cancelled if the doctors weren't able to be finish and be out of the operating theatre by 4:00pm, unless there were complications of course...

Fortunately there were no complications, the nurse said Dr. Ouellette was happy and Pace was back in the room for 6:00. France and I sat with her as she drifted in and out of consciousness. She's in a lot of pain and wants the pain killers but she's got a blood pressure sensitivity to morphine and she doesn't like the "drugged out" sensation of Dilaudid, which is also a morphine based pharmaceutical but has not got the same side effects.

As the nurse said "which do you prefer, the pain or the pain killer?"

France and I left Pace at about 9:30.

The drama is exhausting.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Pre-operative events

Pace got prodded and tested again from 7:00 am till 1:30pm with pre-operative tests. Everything seems like it is a go for the operation.

I took Pace out for a dim sum late lunch. It was the first time in a while that we've been alone and we spent some time talking about what we'd like to focus on once we get the other side of this operation. We just enjoyed each other's company.

We got back to Hopital St-Luc for Pace's 6:30 check-in. As we get to her room there is a sign on the door not to enter without talking to the nursing station first. At the station they tell us that there was a suspicion that the other woman in the room had contracted "C. difficile" and that her tests had come back negative. So I got Pace set up in her room, made sure she was comfortable with everything she neeeded and went to la maison to spend some time with the wee one.

As I was reading the wee one her bedtime story I fell asleep twice, dropping the book on her. "Popa! what are you doooing?"
"Sorry, unh, where were we?" and I continued reading

I woke up 11 hours later feeling still tired but peaceful and the wee one was still in the crook of my arm.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Winter Driving on the 401 and the Ottawa River Ice Bridge

Sometimes you just have to drive and deal with old man winter when you don't want to.

Pace has tests tomorrow (Monday) morning, and she'd recovered from her gastro Sunday AM. So off we went. I didn't bother to check weather conditions in Ontario or Quebec cause all it was going to do was going to do was make the drive more stressful.

We had blizzard conditions for an hour and a half from from Oshawa to Napanee. Then again from Prescott to Cornwall.

Luckily the ice bridge over the Ottawa river is open. The ice has to be 1 foot thick before they open it, it's faster than the ferry, it cuts about 45 minutes off of the trip and We could have visted jean-Louis at his ice fishing hut.

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Monday Morning After Superbowl.

Well Grossman has now earned his reputation as a "choke." I admit the Bears were outplayed on offense, whatever, I just like Soldiers Field and just about everything else about Chicago way more than Indianapolis.

Pace had a great time. Thank-you Todd and Nancy for the hospitality and the cool clothes for the wee one.

We're a week away from admitance to the hospital and it was a welcome release from the last minute jitters and pre operation emotional stress.

Gastro and Pre Operation Angst

So Perry told me that I should be nominated for the Father of the Year award this week. I've been cranking out the work for contracts, long days and short nights.

I got 3 hours sleep on Tuesday, so finally getting to bed at 11:00 on Wed was a slog. At 12:30 Vianne woke up screaming and vomiting and kept it up till 6:00. Thursday night was a repeat engagement. Last night Pace said she wasn't feeling well and going to bed. About 1:00am Pace enacted Gastro, the sequal. She's up most of last night. The wee one got up at 6:00
"I'm hungry"
She obviously is not sick any more.

We were supposed to leave for Montreal today as Pace has to check into St. Luc for pre operation tests on Monday and her operation on Tuesday.

So we're going tomorrow.

Pace is a little freaked, she wanted to have a little time to relax in Oka park before going to the hospital. She's worried about this operation and it's manifesting itself through nightmares and anxiety. Things like the Operating Room covered in blood and she's having an out of body experience.

You listen, you reassure, and you give hugs and kisses. This is not a time for statistics and platitudes.

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Go Bears!


Once great thing about the Super Bowl is the way we can get families together have fun and forget about cancer for a while.

Yeah the boys sidebar to tell me that Pace and I are almost through it, the girls tell me Pace is looking great and how inspirational we are but it's overshadowed by the game.

Right now the distraction's what we really need.

The Colts are favored to win by 7 points. For the last 3 superbowls the game has been decided by only 3 points. Urban legend says Superbowls are usually blowouts. I have a feeling we may be looking at another one tomorrow.

Oh yeah, the Colts suck!

Hysterectomy with Salpingo-oophorectomy

Pace's next operation is a hysterectomy with salpingo-oophorectomy, or rather removal of the uterus, cervix, ovaries and fallopian tubes. It will significantly reduce her chances of having other BCRA1 related cancers.

Some opinions are that you should only have the operation if you have been diagnosed with an urgent medical situation. BRCA1 is an immediately important medical challenge for us. The decision to proceed with the procedure was not a light one. The three top conditions the operation causes are:

  • menopause
  • early osteoporosis
  • elevated risk of heart disease
Another thing is that we won't be able to have any more children unless we adopt, which our friends Jacques and Heather have successfully done, which is a possibility.

The other option is we enter the ambiguous realm of surrogate motherhood egg extraction and cryogenic oocyte (egg) preservation. Umm... no!

Thursday, February 01, 2007

The Cancer Angle in the Argument for Stem Cell Research

A lot of people that have been through the cancer triathlon believe that chemotherapy will be considered as barbaric to our grandchildren as blood-letting is to us.

Chemotherapy targets all cells and maybe we should only be targeting a few cells instead. The Cancer Stem Cell Hypothesis has been around since the 1950s but it has been considered a fringe idea.

Healthy stem cells can give rise to any tissue found in the body and thus provide nearly limitless potential for regenerative medical applications.

Now there is proof that blood cancers, brain and breast tumors are made up of two types of cancer cells. A small percentage of the tumor are cancerous stem cells that generate the multiple cells that actually make up the larger mass. So the real problem in breast cancer is cancer stem cells

Stem cell research is definitely controversial and a potential ethical dilemma. However, if research can help us to single out and destroy the stem cells that cause cancer; I vote for stem cell research.